Love and Respect by Eggerichs

This book about marriage is based on Ephesian 5:33; for husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church, to let wives see that they respects their husband. Eggerichs rightly points out, there are many, lofty examples of "unconditional love" in our culture, but when challenged to think about "unconditional respect" the notion is confusing (if not non-existant). As he builds on truth from Paul letter, he includes stories and examples which build on the notion that most people agree that their spouse is a good-willed, well-intensioned and good-hearted. So why is marriage so hard?

This provides the foundation for the rest of the book, which talks about the crazy cycle (without love -> she reacts -> without respect -> he reacts -> without love). The main section of the book he describes what's called the energising cycle (his love -> motivates -> her respect -> motivates -> his love). In the end, he adds a more eternal and spirital perspective. I found this conclusion helpful as a this book could be misused just as a means to improve a marriage. Eggerichs stresses that these steps techniques are meaningless apart from following Jesus. The book is really more an ecouragement to reconnect with the heart of God, to walk in the Spirit, to glorify God and to obey what he teaches in his Word. He is refreshingly honest about this challenges in marriage and says "... there is no way you can travel it in your own strength... you must ask Christ for help". (pg. 300). I found myself asking Jesus for alot of help as I read this book.